theonion:

Gas Station Clerk Glad To See Pump 2 Doing So Well Today

8bitatoms:

phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess:

sevvey6:

morbidamusement:

captain-snark:

bananamerlin:

maderadearquitecto:

Thermochromic table by Jay Watson

imagine banging someone on that table

imagine being home alone and seeing imprints on that table

noooooo stop

Imagine having a friend sit at that table for a long while, but when they get up there’s no imprints at all.

What if you got up after trying to console a crying friend, and found that you had no imprints… and they were crying because they missed you?

aaaah it was a cool table now it’s a horror/drama story

(Source: rialxoan, via chainsawsavvy)

boyfriendhook:

In which Jaime required coffee in order to sit through the wedding vows. [x]

OMFG BEST MISTAKE EVER

(Source: maimedlion, via queen-chief)

dw:

when someone gives you directions but you go the wrong way

image

(via queen-chief)

princekarkat:

for some reason i thought both of these were the same post and i sat for awhile trying to figure out which ice cream face was the weak bitch

it’s batman

princekarkat:

for some reason i thought both of these were the same post and i sat for awhile trying to figure out which ice cream face was the weak bitch

it’s batman

(Source: princeloptr, via iwould-rathernot)

animalstalkinginallcaps:

DAN, YOU’RE MAKING IT INCREDIBLY HARD FOR ME TO WALK.
WELL, YOU’RE MAKING IT INCREDIBLY HARD FOR ME TO BREATHE, BECAUSE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.
YES, RIGHT, BUT YOU’RE ALSO HURTING MY EAR.
THE EAR THAT IS INSIDE MY EYE RIGHT NOW, FILLING THAT EYE WITH THE ONLY THING I WANT TO LOOK AT FOREVER, WHICH IS YOU?
YES, MOST LIKELY, AND THAT IS SWEET, BUT WHAT I’M  TRYING TO SAY IS-
THAT YOU LOVE ME TOO? FOREVER? BECAUSE WE ARE TOTALLY SOULMATES?
DOES ONE SOULMATE OFTEN PREVENT THE OTHER FROM WALKING IN A STRAIGHT LINE? IS THAT HOW IT WORKS?
SURE. IT’S PROBABLY ALL THE WEAK KNEES AND SWOONING YOU’RE EXPERIENCING FROM BEING IN LOVE WITH ME SO HARD.
DAN, IT’S YOUR HEAD, WHICH IS SMOOSHED DIRECTLY INTO THE SIDE OF MY HEAD, FORCING ME INTO TREES AND BUSHES.
FORCING YOU INTO LOVE, YOU MEAN.
GOD DAMN IT, DAN.

animalstalkinginallcaps:

DAN, YOU’RE MAKING IT INCREDIBLY HARD FOR ME TO WALK.

WELL, YOU’RE MAKING IT INCREDIBLY HARD FOR ME TO BREATHE, BECAUSE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

YES, RIGHT, BUT YOU’RE ALSO HURTING MY EAR.

THE EAR THAT IS INSIDE MY EYE RIGHT NOW, FILLING THAT EYE WITH THE ONLY THING I WANT TO LOOK AT FOREVER, WHICH IS YOU?

YES, MOST LIKELY, AND THAT IS SWEET, BUT WHAT I’M  TRYING TO SAY IS-

THAT YOU LOVE ME TOO? FOREVER? BECAUSE WE ARE TOTALLY SOULMATES?

DOES ONE SOULMATE OFTEN PREVENT THE OTHER FROM WALKING IN A STRAIGHT LINE? IS THAT HOW IT WORKS?

SURE. IT’S PROBABLY ALL THE WEAK KNEES AND SWOONING YOU’RE EXPERIENCING FROM BEING IN LOVE WITH ME SO HARD.

DAN, IT’S YOUR HEAD, WHICH IS SMOOSHED DIRECTLY INTO THE SIDE OF MY HEAD, FORCING ME INTO TREES AND BUSHES.

FORCING YOU INTO LOVE, YOU MEAN.

GOD DAMN IT, DAN.

apatheticghost:

my friends introducing me to people

image

(via sleepingintheflowers)

kisskicker:

More fluffy puffy nonsense animals

kisskicker:

More fluffy puffy nonsense animals

(via sleepingintheflowers)

kourtnian:

dietcrush:

my friend’s dog was sick and couldn’t get up so they were gonna put him down and as his final supper they got him a big mac and when the dog smelled it he shot up and ate it in one bite and lived for three more years

Praise the lord

(via iwould-rathernot)

whackycrack:

handsomejira:

#category 5 kaiju

Q

theyetee:

Hyrule Airlines by Louis Roskosch
Master Keyblade by Drew Wise

$11 each on 04/07 at The Yetee

(via gamefreaksnz)

janellacus:

jellysnack:

Australian cast of The Lion King sings on a plane.  Because actors are nerds no matter where they are.

Are tears what you wanted because that was fucking beautiful.

(via formermaleprostitute)

alonzo1948:

My cousins the best at snapchat and you can’t convince me otherwise

(via electrical-banana)

bulletbakas:

Up Next on Hoarders: Some Guy’s Steam Library

(via sleepingintheflowers)

savethewailes:

aaaaaaaaagggg:

leonmcgann:

image

i dont understand why do so many people make this mistake??

We usually get GARGE SALES. Not even kidding. 

(via zestychille)